I don’t really eat healthy lunches very often. I usually have a little spoonful of peanut butter while I make the kid’s peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Maybe a handful of goldfish crackers, a piece of apple, a half a Tastykake… I don’t do it on purpose. I intend to make myself lunch. But by the time I’m done picking at the kid’s lunches, I’m just not hungry anymore.
And after a while of doing this, I say to myself, “I really need to eat better.” So I go to Whole Foods to buy prairie bread and hummus. And the next day I make myself the
I Really Need to Eat Better Sandwich.
There’s really nothing to this sandwich. Prairie bread, hummus, turkey, tomato, and lettuce. I eat this and I feel like a rock star. Not a literal rock star, though. At least not a rock star with a drug addiction. I grew up in the ’80’s, and there’s no way I’m going to let Nancy Reagan down. I don’t know where I’m going with this. It’s late, and I’m not used to thinking at this hour. If I’m not careful, I might start rambling. Like Steve Martin. “I’m ramblin’, I’m a ramblin’ guy…”
Here’s my sandwich:
And it’s dee-licious. And healthy. And more satisfying than a spoonful of peanut butter. And you get to go to Whole Foods to buy the bread and be all, “Look at me, I’m so great, I shop at Whole Foods” and Al Gore would be happy and then you can say that you made Al Gore and Nancy Reagan proud, and I don’t know how many people can say that. And I should really go to bed now.